Are you in your own way? I’m asking because it’s so easy to get in the way. I’m talking about getting in the way of your own progress, journey, and greatness. Sometimes we self-sabotage and get in our own way intentionally because of fear. We’re afraid of the unknown, afraid of things going wrong, and afraid of things actually going right.
Then again, sometimes it’s subconsciously when we think we’re working away like little worker bees. I’m not sure, but it gets hard out here when we’re on our grind and things seem to be going right. Then, all of a sudden, we throw a wrench into the picture to screw everything up.
Here are four ways to get out of your own way and avoid self-sabotage so you can do that thing you’re supposed to be doing and be great.
1). Feel the fear and do it afraid.
Sometimes we self-sabotage and get in our own way simply because we’re afraid. Fear is a normal human emotion, it’s healthy, and it’s okay to feel it. However, it’s not okay to let it stifle your growth to the point that you remain stagnant, or you simply exist in a box.
The acronym for fear is False Evidence Appearing Real. The fear is false because it’s probably based on a long list of what-if’s that are unlikely to happen. Those what-if’s are the false evidence appearing real. The sad thing is that we keep bringing the false evidence back to life whenever it’s proven untrue.
Another acronym for fear is Focus, Expose, Approach, and Rehearse. You have to focus on the positive aspects of the situation or task while exposing the overwhelming tasks and breaking them down into smaller manageable tasks. Then you have to approach the tasks instead of avoiding them and rehearse everything to help calm your fears.
I will say this: give yourself a day or two to sit with your fears, then get up and get back to work.
Do what you want to do and what you’re meant to do while being afraid, fearful, or scared to death or whatever you want to call it. Don’t let an emotion as insignificant as fear allow you to throw a wrench in your plans to stall or cancel them.
2). Find an accountability partner.
The value of having of having an accountability partner is underestimated. An accountability partner can show up and help you get through so many tough situations in your life. Situations like giving birth, taking an exercise class, starting a self-care routine, launching a new project, and much more can be tolerable and even enjoyable with a trusted accountability partner to motivate and push you to do your best. It’s a great method to stay far away from self-sabotage and to get out of your own way.
I recommend having at least two partners. Ask about five different people if they’re willing to serve as your accountability partner. Tell them what you need from them and see if they’re able to do it. Good communication and flexibility is the key to making this arrangement work.
3). Join a mastermind or business support group.
When positive, supportive, like-minded people surround you, you can’t help but feel and act the same way. You’ll also have an opportunity to connect with other women just like you, and that’s why you should join a mastermind or business support group. I’ve met some phenomenal women in various mastermind and Facebook groups who are living their dreams.
If you can’t find a group to join, consider starting your own.
4). Start saying daily affirmations.
An affirmation is simply a positive thought or saying that is specific to your feelings and situation. The cool thing about them is you can make them as personal as you want to. After repeating an affirmation, you should feel empowered, fearless, and encouraged! Saying affirmations is a great way to avoid a tendency self-sabotage!
We speak to ourselves in our heads in a quiet voice all day long. What are we saying? Instead of calling ourselves names, being negative, and condescending, why not recite your favorite affirmation to lift your spirits or calm yourself? You are what you think.
Therefore, think positive, healing, and motivational thoughts and notice the difference within a few days. Select several of your favorite affirmations to save on your phone, in your journal, or in a notebook to refer back to when you start feeling fearful or like you can’t do this or that, or you want to quit.
Everyone knows what it’s like to get in their own way and self-sabotage. When you’re afraid of the unknown or succeeding, and you’re unconsciously sabotaging things remember that your fears are normal and even healthy. But you don’t have to give in to your fears to the point that you’re stagnant, not living up to your potential, and getting in the way of your greatness. Own your greatness, and work hard to make it happen!